Have the courage to ask.

A pet peeve I have is people who obviously want to but can’t seem to just simply ask me a question. Some people are worse than others. They will talk around the subject to the point where I actually have a good sense, maybe even know what they want to ask, but they will never actually ask the question. There are times where I know I could easily put them out of their misery and ask myself the question for them, but I rarely do. 

In my opinion, especially if you are an artist or playing in a band you need to learn how to get over this aversion and learn how to be a little more direct. Chance are, even if you think you are being obvious, you’re not. If you want me to work with you, you need to be specific and tell me what you would like me to do for you. I’m not a mind reader. I can’t determine what help you need or where I can help you by the unnecessary small talk you are trying to initiate a conversation with. If you unsure of what I do or how I could help you, then that's your first question to get the discussion going. Don't assume I'll just offer that up if you initiate small talk with me.  It scares me to think an artist could potentially be using the same approach to talk to promoters, booking agents about shows and other branches within the music industry.

Am I intimidating? Are you afraid the answer will be something you don't want to hear? Do you think your music will speak for you? Are you assuming that once I listen to the track I will over you the world? (Obviously, I don't have any reservations about asking questions.)

There has been a number of times where I have received music from bands and then when I talk to them, they literally talk about everything else. Most to the time it's usually the smallest of small talk not even music related. Sometimes it even feels like they are almost avoiding asking me what I think of their music. Are you content in simply knowing I listened to it? Is that the only reason you sent it to me was to listen to it? I'd like to think I could potentially offer more than just listening to your music. 

Sadly there are probably some of you reading this blog who are guilty of 'question avoidance' who will probably be even worse now, worried that you’re not being direct enough with your questions.

Have the courage to ask. We both benefit from you asking the question. You will get your answer and I don’t have to listen to you dance around the subject hoping I’ll answer the question without you asking it. Even if the answer to your question is not what you wanted to hear or where expecting, at least the conversation and even the relationship is moving forward. If you continue with the random, unnecessary small talk we don’t move forward. If anything, you make me want to end the conversation even quicker by doing that. Treading water can be great skill to have, but for the most part regardless of how long you do it, you don’t tend to go anywhere.

You never know what can happen if you ask, but you do know what will happen if you don't ask...nothing.

So please…have the courage to ask the question. Give me the opportunity to tell you “You suck!” Haha.

Final side note...if you're reading this and thinking "is this about me?"...there's only one way to find out...ask me.